Tips And Tricks to Dealing With Demon Children
by Quiet Harmony-chan
Summary: Candice and Nightmare are, accidentally, expecting a baby. Of course it's all going to suck because... It's Wonderland, need I say more?
1. Prologue

**A/N: So this is a prologue to this story...**

**...**

**Candice's POV**

**...**

Nightmare stared at the flimsy stick for a moment before looking at me. "You're right, the one you ended up going with was better."

"Actually..." I slid out of his lap. "The trick was supposed to be the coffee actually being some of Gray's soup...Then I was supposed to tell you..."

I tapped my belly in silent anticipation, watching his face contort to surprise then exhaustion. If he expected me to demand marriage or the whole nine yards he better keep breathing or he'll suffocate. In my own mind I thought I'd be better off with someone who wanted to marry me because they loved me, not because we forgot to use a condom...And I was way too drunk to remember to take a pill the next morning.

"Even if you think that," Nightmare said, successfully scattering my thoughts. "I'll still marry you."

"I don't want to f-

"You're not forcing me into anything, I want to marry you _because_ I love you." He placed a hand on my stomach. "And wouldn't you want to our baby to have a father?"

"Yeah..." I shift uncomfortably under his hand. It was true that I was ecstatic that he was marrying me, and I was even beginning to achieve my dream in getting married and having a family; but I had so many issues and then there were his issues.

I laid down and sigh, ignoring Nightmare's wandering hands that suddenly seemed engrossed in my nearly flat stomach. Now that I got the easy part out of the way, it was time to do the hard part.

Time to tell everyone else.

**...**

**_Journal Entry 1: Hello baby, I have no idea what gender you are but your father insisted I make this. So in case you end up pregnant, or going to expect children, I will give you all my tips and tricks...You'll turn out to be a demon just like your father so I'm not even sure this'll be relevant to you, but in the case it is you'll have it. So here's the first tip..._**

**_Never forget a condom!_**

**...**

**A/N: Well that's a subtle way to say you're a mistake...**


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: And since I completed **_**Death Shall Take Thee **_**I now advance on with this Au story. **

**BloodyAyame23: You'd think so...But then you wonder why the world is over populated.**

**BlueshineMoon:Here is your long awaited reaction, enjoy!**

**Senna Bluefire: Ha, yes if a Nightmare junior did appear that would be how he looked.**

**Angel Protectress: A happy accident...Well someone was very happy alright...-_-**

**Sleeping Moon: Ha, I think the child will be upset to read that entry, but I'm glad you liked it.**

**...**

**Third Person POV**

**...**

Nightmare stared down at the many documents that sat on his desk. He didn't make any attempt to do them, and not for the reasons he normally had. This time his thoughts were wrapped entirely around a single foreigner that laid in his bed resting. For the last twelve time changes the woman had gone through 'morning' sickness, leaving her way more tired than usual. He had insisted she stay home and told Gowland through a dream that she wouldn't be coming to work.

This had caused concern and a barrage of questions from the Duke, but Nightmare had caused the man to wake up, not caring to explain his empoyee's...Sick...Condition. If Gowland were to know it wouldn't be long before everyone else in Wonderland found out, and he could only imagine what his fate would be then.

"Nightmare?"

He quickly looked up and saw Candice walk in. She didn't seem much different, her stomach had yet to swell, or her breast, all that changed was the dark circles under her eyes. "What's wrong?"

She went over to the incubus and straddled him. "I'm no longer tired and bored." She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a seductive smile. "Entertain me."

Nightmare kissed her neck, moving his hands along her belly up to her chest which immediately brought a moan from her lips. "You're more sensitive than usual."

Candice made to retort, but stopped when the door opened and an exhausted Gray entered the room. He took one look at his master and Candice before setting the arm load of papers onto the desk. "Candice, I would appreciate it if you tried to resist Lord Nightmare's seduction, he's only trying to resist work."

"That's not true!" Nightmare's hold on her slackened. "She's the one coming in here and seducing me."

"Very likely story, Lord Nightmare." Gray said with an eye roll. "Now please finish up so we can begin this meeting."

Candice got off her lover. "I forgot about the meeting..."

What would everyone think when they saw her? She wasn't noticable yet, but if you saw the way she held her stomach or some other little action it wouldn't take too long to guess what was wrong with her. Perhaps she should at least tell Gray so he would keep-

"That's actually a good idea Candice." Nightmare said as he heard her thoughts. "Gray, Candice and I actually have something to tell you."

The yellow eyes stared intently at his master for a moment before glancing back to Candice who was chewing her bottom lip. "Candice is pregnant?"

"And how'd you come up with that?"

Gray shrugged. "I can't think of much else you would be telling me...Aside from the fact that you both were getting married."

The people in question looked at each other before Candice touched her stomach. "Well...You're right on both points."

"Then I'm happy for you both," He turned back to his master. "but until the baby arrives there will be no slacking on work."

"But I have to support my wife!"

"The 'support' you were just giving her was hardly necessary."

Candice giggled and was about to skip off, but Gray grabbed her arm before she could make it out of the room. "Not so fast, you ought to be resting."

"But Gray!" She squeaked as she was lifted off the floor. "Oh, come one it ain't that serious!" She looked over his broad shoulders. "Nightmare help me!"

"Have fun Candice~."

"Nightmare Gottschalk you fu-"

_**Slam!**_

**...**

Two time changes later and the meeting was being held. Candice had never really been fond of the meetings and would always put in extra hours at the Amusement Park, but with her current condition that was out of the question.

So there she was staring blankly at a wall, listening to the pointless chatter around her while she waited for the meeting to begin. She didn't even look up as Pierce came to sit next to her, partly because they were friends, and partly to use her as a shield against Boris.

"Hey Candice, what're you doing, chu?"

The woman glanced over to him. "Trying to entertain myself, what about you?"

He looked over to Boris who was wrestling with the twins, this made a smile form on the foreigner's face."I'll make him stay away Pierce." She yanked him to her chest. "I always do~."

"I don't understand why you are holding that rat, but you should let it go," Peter said as he came over to Candice. "I doubt it's healthy."

"Don't be mean to him Peter," Candice said. "Pierce is adorable."

The rabbit man huffed and pushed Pierce out of his seat, sending him crashing to the floor. Without missing a beat he sat in the stolen seat, giving Candice a warm smile. "I've missed you so much my love, truly you have missed me just as much!"

Candice looked around Peter to make sure Pierce was okay."No, I miss Pierce, he was cuter. I know I come from Georgia, but I'm not into incest."

"Don't concern yourself with that rat, he'll live. And anyway we are not siblings and you're the only one to see us as such, I on the other hand..." He picked up Candice's hand and kissed it. "See us as much more."

"Um..."

"You really shouldn't say anything like that or the caterpillar might kill you."She jumped when Ace snuck up behind her, a dark smile on his face. "In fact I just might do it."

The Knight and Prime Minister glared at each other for nearly three seconds before their weapons were drawn. At any other time Candice would just bolt and pray that she would live through it, but she happened to be the host for a tiny being in her womb. Just when the first bullet fired something louder than the bang could be heard.

"I'm Pregnant!"

Peter turned to stare at her while Ace barely manged to block the bullet.

"What?" They said it in perfect harmony.

"I-I'm pregnant..." Candice's face lit up when she saw that her outburst had caught the attention of the other Role Holders. There was a long silence and at that moment she wished Nightmare and Gray werent busy getting last minute things together so they could do damage control. Just as she thought it couldn't get any worse Vivaldi clapped her hands and glided towards her.

"Congratulations, Candice." She placed a hand on her stomach. "Do you know the gender yet?"

"Well-"

"You're worried about the gender!" Boris snapped, scampering towards the two. "I want to know her knocked her up!"

"Obviously the caterpillar." Blood droned. "It's obvious the two rarely sleep, hell I'm sure even in sleep while they are in the Dream Realm their minds are working on all kinds of erotic fan-"

"Impossible!" Peter glared at the Hatter. "Candice would never do such impure things."

Gowland shook his head. "That does explain why you haven't been coming to work..."

Candice could only hold her head in her hands a the many questions and arguments began amongst the Role Holders. Oh God what had she done?

**...**

_**Journal Entry 2: Hell dear. I have no idea if you'll have children on your own one day, but believe me when I say use tact when announcing it to the world. If you don't you'll be screwed...Or your lover will die, either one is bad.**_

_**...**_

**A/N: And there you go! Ha, I kinda want to write a lemon thanks to Blood...I hate that man.**


End file.
